Book-A-Minute highly condensed books. A very similar concept to the Reduced Shakespeare Company, only not quite as funny and, well, online. Still worth a couple minutes of browsing. I of course went straight to the Complete works of Lovecraft:
I will tell you about something horrific I witnessed.
(Narrator discusses MUNDANE experiences which supposedly lead up to something HORRIFIC.)
We’re almost at the horrific bit.
(Narrator talks about more stuff that might be SPOOKY if he’d only GET ON WITH IT.)
We’re very close now.
(Narrator draws it out MORE.)
This time I swear we’re just about at the horrific thing almost.
(Narrator FINALLY gets to the HORRIFIC thing which is HUGE and POWERFUL and EVIL and LAME.)